Being Seen| Expectations |Leading With The Heart
Hello there! Welcome to my weekly LEAPS.
You’re receiving this email because you subscribed to my weekly Wednesday feature or our mailing list. Every Wednesday, I share 5 things using our LEAPS approach:
Learn: something new or an idea
Energy: an energy (good or bad) word and it’s meaning
Action: something to do
Processing: a question to consider
Shout out: something or someone that I want to celebrate or acknowledge
LEARN
Something Worth Sharing
Being Seen
Yesterday, I was reminded about a “learn” from 2016. On January 1st 2016 I committed to carrying out a ‘random act of kindness’ each day for a year. As the 100th day approached, I wanted to do something significant.
After much deliberation, I decided to send 100 people each a note - assorted people I was connected to, some I knew well and others were acquaintances. The notes began by explaining that they were one of my 100 people and that it was part of my kindness experiment. I went on to say I wanted to spread kindness and was therefore writing to them to let them know what I most admired about them.
Each note included… “[insert name], I most admire you for…” The range of personal notes then shared things like:
your open heartedness and ability to listen
your love and compassion for others
making me feel at ease and so welcomed
your giving spirit and warm smile
your love and devotion to your friends and family
your resilience and ability to smile despite the challenges you’ve faced
When I did this, I had no idea that it would create such an impact. After I’d sent the first 5 notes (via Linkedin messaging, text, Whatsapp, Facebook messager etc), I unexpectedly began to receive replies. People told me how wonderful if was to receive, that it brought them to tears and one even shared with me that they were in a dark place and didn’t realise anyone noticed them - the note turning everything round. My learn for you this week is that we ALL need to be seen and heard. We ALL need to give and receive kindness. We ALL need to be open to telling those in our lives that matter, that they do matter. We never know when kindness will turn someone’s life around.
ENERGY
An emotion or energy; a stand-out word / s
Expectation
One of the biggest things that we know influences relationships, teams, families, and people in general, is ‘expectations’. We have expectations of ourselves that are often unfair and unachievable. We have assumptions of what we think others expect of us - often completely different from their actual expectations. Failing to discuss and agree expectations is where tensions and issues can often arise.
The word ‘expectation’ is from Latin word EXSPECTARE meaning "await, look out for". In other words, to have expectations is to make a decision of what we believe will happen in the future - what we are waiting for. It is a set of preconceived opinions as to what will likely take place - so it seems reasonable to make sure we discuss and agree what is fair and reasonable for this with all that are involved, otherwise we are left disappointed and frustrated.
ACTION
Something small that you can do that might make a big difference
Challenge Yourself
Do something this week that challenges you. You might choose to do this as a physical or mental challenge - do a puzzle or quiz, or strive for a longer run or walk. It would be even better if you share your challenge with an accountability buddy.
PROCESSING
A question to think about and consider (you can discuss this with someone or write your thoughts down)
“What are you waiting for?”
This question can apply to anything - but it is important. Most of us will have something in our lives that - if we are completely honest - we are putting off or avoiding. So, what are you really waiting for? What is stopping you or holding you back?
I’d love for you to send me your own stories / thoughts about this. Drop me a line with your answer / thoughts on this question
SHOUT OUT
Who / what I think deserves recognition - my gratitude or to be celebrated.
Being Someone’s WHO
This shout out may only make sense if you’ve read WHO NOT HOW by Dr Benjamin P Hardy and Dan Sullivan. The book explains the importance of having a team of people around you that can help you to accomplish your goals (while you help them accomplish theirs). Rather than thinking about "how can I do / achieve this?", it is about switching to "who can do this for / with me?". I’m shouting out the people that are part of our WHO teams.
BONUS GIFT FOR YOU
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LEAPS is a process used by our team and clients all the time - and even my own family on a daily basis.
I’ll be sharing a set of LEAPS each week with you and encourage you to do your own version:
L: what have you learned?
E: what’s your energy / feeling word
A: what’s one thing you need to do?
P: what are you thinking / processing?
S: who or what can you shout out?
