17.11.2021

Expectation Management | Extol | Show Your Work

Hello there! Welcome to my weekly LEAPS. 

You’re receiving this email because you subscribed to my weekly Wednesday feature or our mailing list. Every Wednesday, I share 5 things using our LEAPS approach: 

Learn: something new or an idea
Energy: something that’s creating an energy and positive impact
Action: something to do
Processing: a question to consider
Shout out: something or someone that I want to celebrate or acknowledge

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LEARN
Something Worth Sharing

Expectation Management

I have to admit to a history of setting very harsh and demanding expectations for myself. Occasionally I can slip back into this.

Earlier this week, I was determined to do a workout; I generally workout on alternate days, but on this particular day my diary was full with client sessions. I had a decision to make, do I: 1) get my training kit on in the hope of meeting my workout expectation at some point in the day - which wasn’t likely or 2) accept that today isn’t going to happen for training and make sure I do it tomorrow?

I believe in living deliberately - making choices and owning them. My decision was to accept that I wouldn’t train but would 100% do so the following day. I instantly felt better AND allowed myself to fully focus on my clients. The following day I worked out first thing and enjoyed it far more than trying to cram it in between clients.

Expectation management is a vital part of how we relate - to ourselves and to others. There are 5 things that help with this:

1. Clarity - what is expected and why?

2. Share - communicate this and don’t assume everyone can read your mind

3. Agree - in a group, agree the expectations of everyone

4. Accountability - there is always a possibility of missing the expectation so be clear about the accountability

5. Adjust - just like my example, sometimes we need to adjust the expectation

If I’d have stayed in my training kit and failed to workout, my expectations would have led to a feeling of failing and annoyance at myself - easing those expectations and adjusting them meant a much better day.

ENERGY
Focusing on an emotion or positive energy; a stand-out word / s

EXTOL

This week, I’d like to share with you the fact that I came across a new word - one that I had to look up.

When I looked into it, I discovered that this is indeed a beautiful word - coming from the Latin word EXTOLLERE meaning ‘to place high, raise, elevate’. It means to praise enthusiastically.

I guess we can say that it is the ‘S’ from LEAPS: to ‘shout out’. I love finding words that I’m not familiar with.

ACTION
Something small that you can do that might make a big difference

Share Your Passions

Based on this week’s recommended read at the end of these LEAPS, I’m encouraging you to share a passion - show the world. You could either tell someone about your love of drawing, baking, woodwork, reading, clothes etc or put it out into the world - think of this as gifting your passions to the world.

My visual synopsis pieces began as a very personal way of taking notes - and now I share them with the world. They are a passion, and can also help others. Do you have something that you could “gift” into the world?

A simple example would be to gift a home-baked cake to someone - if that’s what you love doing in your spare time.

PROCESSING
A question to think about and consider (you can discuss this with someone or write your thoughts down)

“What’s the toughest decision you’ve made?”

We find that asking people about the toughest experiences they’ve gone through - and toughest decisions that they’ve had to make - can reveal so much about the person. It often leads to seeing how resilient and courageous they are and building compassion and empathy.

Join me at 11am (UK time) in our Deliberately Inquisitive Clubhouse session as below to discuss what the toughest decision is that you’ve had to make.

Clubhouse at 11am (UK) on 19th November

SHOUT OUT
Who / what I think deserves recognition, my gratitude or to be celebrated.

Kindness by Post

A couple of years ago I stumbled across an initiative called #kindnessbypost. This is something run by a UK-based charitable organisation: The Mental Health Collective.

The simple, and yet powerful concept, is to sign up to both give and receive a card in the post - the old fashioned way. Once signed up, on a pre-set date you are matched with someone - a complete stranger - and their address is issued to you. Next, you draw or create a card (usually based on a theme) and pop it in the post to them. Hopefully over the next few days you’ll receive something back from another stranger that was given your details.

Their website states that over 12,000 people have taken part in the initiative so far and while it is only open to those in the UK, it is really quite special. I’ve lost count of how many cards I’ve hand-drawn and sent to strangers - each with a personal letter. I urge you to sign up, you don’t have to be a great artist to take part but the exchange of kindness is just wonderful. My shout out is to those that take part, those behind this simple but wonderful idea - and especially the charity’s CEO who I’ve come to know and who was generous enough to contribute to my own research about self-kindness. So here’s to you Dr Amy Pollard!

•you can still sign up for this next round of #kindnessbypost. Registrations for the Christmas #KindnessByPost exchange close at 9pm on Friday 3rd December. https://www.kindnessbypost.org/

BONUS GIFT FOR YOU
This week’s little extra for you - from me

Last week’s recommended read and visual synopsis is for another of Austin Kleon’s books, this one being: Show Your Work.

Click the button below to access a free download for the visual synopsis.

As it was World Kindness Day on the 13th November, I’m also giving you the poster that I created for the day - which included words from F Scott Fitzgerald

Order Your Deliberate Year Calendar-Planner

LEAPS is a process used by our team and clients all the time - and even my own family on a daily basis. 

I’ll be sharing a set of LEAPS each week with you and encourage you to do your own version:

• L: what have you learned?

• E: what’s your energy / feeling word

• A: what’s one thing you need to do?

• P: what are you thinking / processing?

• S: who or what can you shout out?